When was the last time you were able to close your closet door? Don’t worry, you’re not alone. Nor should you be: The task of cleaning out your closet solo is near impossible. When you look into your wardrobe, you see all the memories that give life to your clothes; you’re aware of the money you spent on them, and each time you consider extracting a piece, a chorus of “what ifs” sings in your head: What if miniskirts come back? What if I take a trip to Morocco? What if Jake Gyllenhaal asks me out on a date? What if Kristen Stewart invites me to play catch on the beach? It isn’t easy to limit your options, or find an advisor you trust who has the patience to take on the task with you.
And so, unless you’re Kim Kardashian West with a closet-cleanse-giddy husband (this week she tweeted that the two were up all night redoing her wardrobe for a “New 2015 vision”), you need this flowchart. It addresses all the excuses you can make for yourself while attempting to edit your wardrobe. All you have to do in return is commit, and try your best to be honest.
I developed this line of questioning two years ago while playing the role of closet-cleaning guru for my good friend Audrey Gelman. As she held up each piece, I asked her: Do you need it? Does it fit? What is its sentimental value? Do you look like future you or past you in this? The deal was: We sorted through, and at the end, she got veto power on three pieces and could take them from the donate pile and put them back in her closet. Plus, we simultaneously made a list of new things to look forward to buying that would streamline and define her look. We’re still friends, so it couldn’t have been that painful. Try it out for yourself, or bring it along when a friend asks you to be a wardrobe-trimming voice of reason—just remember what Kanye told Kim when they cleaned out her closet on Keeping Up With the Kardashians in 2012: “Sometimes silence is the best response.” Now toss it on the pile.
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